Days and Nights

Just when I felt like we were finally getting into a routine, this week happens.

Sweet little Amelia has had her days and nights reversed, and I thought we were finally making headway, but this week was a big u-turn back in the wrong direction.

Silas has this little book of opposite sayings in his book collection, and I think that it adequately describes Amelia's sleep cycle right now. She sleeps great during the day. She sleeps in her bouncy chair, the swing, my moby wrap, even her bassinet. Despite my best efforts to wake her up, and keep her up, I am losing the battle. She loves to sleep when the suns out, and party when the moons out!

Our doctor says that by about 6 to 8 weeks babies will get themselves on a similar schedule to ours, well she'll be 8 weeks next week and I hope she's right because this is one exhausted mama! Not that I don't love to cuddle with Amelia at night, there is no older sibling which to compete for my attention.

I know this season will pass soon, but when your living right in the middle of it, it seems so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Amelia is growing and eating well, and has even smiled at me a time or two! She is such a sweet baby, and I love to listen to her sweet little coos, even if it is at 2 in the morning!



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Amelia's Birth Story

I finally have a few free minutes to write about Amelia's birth story. Her birth was much different than Silas' birth, in fact everything about this pregnancy and even delivery have been very different and at times extremely difficult. On the flip side, once Silas was born he had a lot of difficulties and complications with jaundice, low birth weight, and nursing, while Amelia has been incredibly easy going and a great nurser, in fact yesterday at her two week appointment she weighed in 2 ounces past her birth weight!

It all started the day before, Wednesday, were my doctor and perinatoligist (high risk OB, I had to go to them too because of the gestational diabetes) wanted to induce me because some of my sugar levels had risen. We already had an induction date scheduled for the next week, and honestly I didn't want to be induced. Having done my research of natural birth, been going through our Bradley Method for a second time, I knew that by being induced the odds were against me of having a natural birth. After a late afternoon phone conversation with my doctor I told her that I would talk to my husband that evening and give her a phone call the next morning. I knew she wanted to induce me the next day, but she agreed to wait and have me think about my options. I was pretty upset, and when Brett came home from work and we talked about it, we both decided that we wanted to wait a few days, and see what would happen over the weekend. If I didn't go into labor naturally, then we would agree to the early induction.

That night I woke up around 12:30am and just did not feel very well. Being a pregnant lady I was used to waking up several times a night needing to use the restroom or just uncomfortable. This was different, but I didn't really think much of it at the time so I was able to fall back asleep. About two hours later I woke up to a contraction, again I didn't think much of it because I had been having irregular Braxton Hicks contractions for months now. However this one was a little stronger and kept me awake. About 10 minutes later I felt another one. From the time I woke up until about 3:00am I laid in bed and timed them. I had about 4 contractions all about 10-12 minutes apart. I decided to get up, walk around, and have a snack to just to check to see if these were in fact "real contractions." For the next several hours, I paced the living room, watched TV, and tried to read as I timed my contractions. They were regular at 10 minutes apart. Finally at 6:00am I woke Brett up and told him that I was having contractions and he should call in to the office. I took a shower and got dressed, during this time my contractions stopped. I knew that this could happen in early labor as you start to get excited about being in labor. But we continued to do things around the house to get prepared. My mom came over around 8:00am, and then we sent Silas over to my mother-in-law's house. I called my doctor's office to let her know what was going on, but I knew that we couldn't do anything until the contractions were closer together at 5 minutes apart. So we waited. I walked around the house to get my contractions moving along again, which they started back up. We packed our bag, and got the car loaded, and I continued to walk around.

Around 11:30am, they were back to being regular about 8-10 minutes apart. We decided to go get some lunch, because I knew that I wouldn't be allowed to eat once I did make it to the hospital. The contractions were starting to come a little stronger, and a little more frequently at about 6-7 minutes. After lunch, Brett and I went to the Target which is right across the street from the hospital. We wanted to keep walking around, but didn't want to go all the way back home. While we were walking my contractions got very intense, some were right on top of each other, and at times I couldn't even walk I was just hunched over the shopping cart. Brett called back the Doctor and she told us to go on in to the hospital.

We got to the hospital, and got checked in to the maternity floor. The nurse hooked me up to the fetal monitor and checked me. I was still just dilated to a 3 which is what I was about 2 days ago. Also during this time my contractions stopped again which was pretty frustrating. The nurse told me that she would monitor the heartbeat for about 30 minutes than have me walk around for an hour and then check my progress. The whole time while walking around I was have a few contractions that were hardly strong at all, and they were a little more than 10 minutes apart. I wasn't progressing at all. Finally my doctor came in and told me that I could go home and continue to labor, or I could have my water broken to get things moving. She assured me that since I was already having contractions I would probably not need to be put on pitocin, that the contractions would pick up on their own. Brett and I spent about 30 minutes talking about it, and after much frustration I decided to go ahead and have my water broken. I didn't want to go through the drama of going home only to have to come back again, plus I knew my doctor was recommending to break my water anyway.

At 5:00pm my doctor broke my water which was the strangest feeling, completely different than when my water broke naturally with Silas. I also has a sort of freak out moment because I knew there was no turning back now! I was allowed to continue walking for an hour, than had to be hooked up to the monitor for about 15 minutes. My contractions definitely picked up in frequency and intensity. Walking the halls really helped. I continued walking the halls until around 8:30pm, then after that I wanted to stay pretty close to our room. The next hour and half  my contractions were pretty much right on top of each other, and extremely painful. This was the part where I totally understand why women opt for pain meds, and in fact I told Brett that I didn't think I could do it anymore. Thankfully he was very encouraging and a great coach. At 9:45pm, the doctor on call came in to check me (my doctor's shift had ended so another doctor in her practice would be delivering me which I wasn't thrilled about but there was nothing I could do about that). I had only dilated to a 7. By this time my contractions were incredibly intense, and I had so much pressure to start wanting to push naturally. The doctor told me I could not start pushing because I wasn't fully dilated yet, but I don't think he understands what if feels like to have your body take control and start pushing naturally. The pain was so intense that I actually started to throw up, which in looking back now I think that is what helped fully dilated me because in about a 10 minute window I went from a 7 to fully dilated.

I was finally allowed to push, as if my body was going to wait any longer, and during one last final contraction with one push Amelia Josephine was born at 10:15pm. After almost 18 hours of labor my daughter finally came into this world. I also thought it was incredibly beautiful that she was born to my favorite song by my favorite artist. Sara Grove's "Add to the Beauty" was playing in the background.

Unlike Silas, Amelia took to nursing naturally and latched on as soon as she was placed on my chest. She remained there for the next hour, and has been a nursing pro ever since.

 I completely enjoyed the whole labor experience with Silas and I am glad that I had that experience first. Even though Amelia's birth wasn't quite as easy or what I had planned and envisioned, I'm still glad that I was able to have a second medication-free child birth. I can't say that I would be to eager to replicate that again though, but hopefully with time God will give me the strength to go through labor again if He so blesses us with another child.

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A little mommy guilt

I'm sure that many women who are about to have their second child go through a normal phase of mommy guilt, or at least I am. I am so excited for Baby Girl's arrival in a few short days, but I'm also a little sad at the same time. I know my hormones are raging because I have been going from tears to giggles in a matter of moments lately.

I'm sad because my days alone with just Silas and I are coming to a close and soon he is going to have to share my attention, affection, and love with another. I'm sure that he is going to be just fine, and he is young enough that he will adjust. It's me who has become the blubbering, sentimental mom. I have been going through his baby book, looking at his newborn pictures and have been reminded just how quickly the time has gone by. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that when I brought him home from the hospital, 19 months later I would be bringing home his little sister too.

Baby Girl will officially be here next week. Since I have gestational diabetes my OB recommends that it is best for the baby's health and mine to deliver by 39 weeks. So next Thursday if she hasn't come on her own, we will be inducing. I'm not thrilled with the prospect of having to be induced. I had such a great, natural childbirth experience with Silas and I really want to be able to experience that again. I know that with inductions my chances for pain medicines, and even possibly a C-Section do go up. So I'm doing everything possible to try to go into labor naturally this weekend.

Which also makes me realize that these are in fact my last few days with just Silas. I have been trying to make them count and spending as much intentional time with him as possible. (Not that I haven't been doing that anyway!) Last week we went to the Deanna Rose Farmstead in the morning, and he loved feeding the baby goats. We've also been cuddling a lot more, especially during naps. I realize that in a few weeks when I need him to get back to napping alone in his crib I may regret this, but for now I'm enjoying this special time.

I have been spending the past few months in pure nesting mode- cleaning, organizing, purging, baking, freezer cooking. And I must admit it's been a long time since our house has been this organized. Our freezer is stocked full with foods that I have been cooking. Brett jokes that we're ready for the Apocalypse! While all this nesting has been good, and I will really appreciate being organized once I have Two Under Two, I have also been really trying to focus as much of my energy on my time with Silas.

So hopefully Baby Girl will come on her own before next Thursday, that's what we're praying for! While I'm waiting, I'm going to be spending as much time with Silas as I possibly can.

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I'm Back!

After a rather long blogging break, I'm going to attempt to try blogging again (fingers crossed). So we will see how long I can keep it up this time. About a week after my last post I found out I was pregnant again with Baby O #2 and to say I was anything but surprised would be a lie.

Silas had just turned 11 months old and I was preparing for his first birthday, with tears in my eyes, seriously how could he have already been a year old anyway? One night when I was getting up from the couch I felt a sharp pain in my lower belly. It made me pause for a minute and I started thinking. Over the next few days I started really paying attention to my body and doing some math. At dinner one night I told Brett that I think I might be pregnant. Ever so confidently he told me I wasn't, but I was pretty sure, 85% sure I told him. He just looked at me with his reassuring look and told me not to panic until I bought a pregnancy test. I told him that I bought one and I was going to take it that night. Then he started laughing as if this couldn't even be real.

Brett and I were in the starting phases of talking about when we wanted Baby #2. We were thinking about waiting until Silas was a little closer to 18 months to 2 years old before we actually got serious about having another baby. We were in for quite a shock, especially as the pink positive sign appeared. We both burst out laughing, and then I started crying. Baby Meltdown #1. I was just starting to get my pre-pregnancy body back. I was starting to sleep really well again. I felt like I had a pretty good routine down with Silas. Over the next month I had about two more meltdowns, one in private and the other in front of my book club ladies. I was slowly coming to the realization that I was in fact going to have another baby and I might as well get used to it.

Then the nausea and exhaustion hit me like a freight train. This pregnancy has been really hard on my mentally, emotionally, and physically. I had more morning sickness than I did with Silas, thankfully that has passed. I was, and still am, battling extreme exhaustion. The simplest tasks make me feel like I just ran a marathon, so you can imagine that taking care of a busy, mess making, energy filled, demanding yet adorable toddler boy has left me even more wiped out. The constant binding down, picking him up, letting him crawl all over me has left me feeling very achy. Plus I have also been feeling rather guilty because when I should be enjoying this time playing with him, all I want to do is crawl up on the couch and take a nap. Some days I still hold him during his nap just to cuddle with him.

On the emotional side of the pregnancy I feel like we have been through a lot too. When we found out that we were having a girl, we also found out that there might be some complications with her heart. Then we found out that she might have Downs Syndrome. So for about three weeks I was in a dark place trying to not let every negative thought enter into my mind. Thankfully all of the tests came back negative and our doctor assured us that we should have a happy and healthy baby girl.

So from the start of the year our family has been on a crazy ride. As I enter into the summer months and into my third trimester, I am beginning to feel really good again. I am nesting too, which means the house is getting a major cleaning. And I'm just trying to enjoy being with Silas. Yesterday I took him to a nearby playground. He had a blast, but let's just say the equipment is not meant for a 28 week pregnant lady. I was feeling the effects of that all night!

As I have been investigating the world of pink, I am getting more and more excited about welcoming Baby Girl Osborn into the world in early September. Seriously how cute is little girls clothing?

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The Nap Time Battle

I must admit that when I dreamed about my life as a stay-at-home mom I had visions of being productive, having a clean house, eating healthy cooked-from-scratch meals, and accomplishing several projects and tasks around the house. None of the above is true, in fact it is quite far from the truth. I get quite jealous of other mom blogs that boast about the really cute craft or cooking project they accomplished during the day. I'm lucky to have gotten dressed!

I feel like my house is messier and cluttered. The other night I was so tired we had chicken nuggets, tator-tots, and some frozen vegetables I found in the freezer for dinner. I have had the pieces to the fall wreath that I had planned on making piled up on the dinning room table for over a week now. I just feel like I can't get it together.

The problem is coming from a baby who will not nap, unless it is in my arms. I blame the grandmas while they were babysitting, to much holding him throughout the day. Silas will be sound asleep in my arms, and as soon as I lay him in his crib he is wide awake and crying. It has been extremely frustrating and draining. I have really been working hard at trying to create a routine of an morning and afternoon nap. Some days he will do really well with one nap, just not the other. Once he is asleep in his crib it is a race to try and get something done before he wakes up again. He usually only stays asleep for about 45 minutes on average.

He is a good night time sleeper, sleeping anywhere from 6 to 9 hours in is crib, I have no idea why he won't take naps. When he does sleep, he is so peaceful and sweet looking.

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First Foods

This past week another "first" milestone occurred, one that is bitter-sweet for me: Silas ate his first bite of solid food. Until last Sunday evening, Silas was exclusively breastfeed since birth. While this is exciting to see him do something new and experience more of these firsts, it is also the beginning of the end of a very long, difficult, often frustrating journey of nursing which has since transformed into my favorite moments of my days.

While I was still in the hospital I thought that nursing was going well, but the first afternoon we returned home Silas wasn't latching on. We returned back to the hospital for a weight check and to test to see if his biliruben levels had gone down. They hadn't and he had lost almost a full pound down from his birth weight. He was admitted to Children's Mercy hospital to be placed under the photo therapy lights to bring his biliruben levels down ( he had an extremely high reading, and his jaundice was causing his skin to look very reddish/orange.)

He also was hooked up to an IV to help replenish his fluids, watching a three day old get hooked up to an IV is not a fun thing to watch. I was devastated. Since he wasn't feeding regularly, the nurses wanted to start him on formula supplement, again that was a crushing blow to me. I had planned to nurse him. I thought that nursing would be easy and natural, but it wasn't. Instead of offering formula, the hospital let me pump and give him milk in a bottle. I wasn't planning on pumping or giving him a bottle for a while. He started eating through the bottle, gaining weight and his biliruben levels started to lower. He was able to come home the next day.

The next few weeks were an exhaustive period of pumping, bottle feedings and trying to get him to latch on. I worked with a lactation consultant through the hospital where he was born. She was a great help, resource and advocate for me. I probably would not have continued if it wasn't for her.

After many tears of frustration, a month later we were happily nursing. There have been several bumpy spots along the way, including three different nursing strikes. Both Brett and I joke about how Silas is a very strong willed little boy! Looking back now, I am grateful for the challenge that we went through. I feel like an expert on nursing due to all the resources and research I read. Pumping also allowed Brett to be involved in the feedings. Many times he would take Silas in the middle of the night and give him a bottle so I could sleep. Cuddling with Silas after nursing is now my absolute favorite thing.

So now he almost 6 months and eating his first taste of solid foods. He enjoys eating his rice cereal and is evening opening his mouth when I bring the spoon near his mouth!

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No Rest for the Weary

The past few nights have sent my memory back to the early days of mothering Silas when I wasn't getting much sleep. Since then I have been really fortunate to have a son who sleeps for about 8 to 9 hours straight. Not so the case in recent memory.

Silas has been waking up extremely early, as in before 5:00 am, wanting to eat. I guess waking up to early is not something to be to worried about, it just messes up with my schedule. But in reality life with a four and a half month old really doesn't set itself up for "scheduled" success.

Sunday morning was when I first hit the wall because I was sooo tired when I first heard Silas' adorable, little coos coming from his room. I do say adorable because when I go in to get him, he is smiling, cooing, and babbling. Who could get upset to waking up to that?

Then last night happened, which I attribute to a busy, out of routine, Fourth of July, and the noise of nearby fireworks. Silas had only taken three 30 minute naps all day. We had a houseful of family all wanting to play with Silas. Who could sleep through the battling grandmas grabbing for egual attention from a cute, little one? I knew he was going to be extremely tired and sleep really well. Or at least I thought.

An hour after putting him down, I was already half way asleep myself, when I heard an ear piercing scream-cry. There is nothing like bolting out of bed, half asleep, to a heart pounding cry! I quickly picked him up and soothed him. After a bit of walking, rocking, singing and feeding, he finally feel back asleep. About an hour later, the same thing happened.

I awoke to another scream-cry. I picked him up, soothed him, changed his diaper, then put his pacifier in his mouth. 30 seconds later, he was out cold. I hung out in the nursery for a while, rocking in the glidder to make sure he was in fact asleep.

Three hours later, he was back up crying. It was a long night, and I was quite tired this morning when he awoke, cooing and babbling this time. Even when it's early, I would much rather wake up to a happy baby, than a screaming, crying one!

The most challenging thing that I have been learning in these first few weeks of transition to staying at home, is that as hard as I try to create a schedule, God has other plans for me. While I definitly didn't enjoy my three wake up calls last night, I most enjoyed holding my little one and looking into his eyes, trying to assure him that he was okay. It is such a wonderful feeling watching Silas fall back asleep in my arms, knowing that he is safe and loved.

As I spent most of my night rocking Silas back to sleep, I prayed for God's guidance and peace over his life. I sang my favorite hymns and worship songs to him, and I thanked God for giving me the opportunity to be Silas' mother.

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A year in my heart

A year ago this past week I found out I was pregnant with Silas. I remember how excited and terrified I felt all in one. It is hard to believe that Silas has been in my heart and on my mind for over a year now.


I love being Silas' mommy. Every day he does something new as he grows and develops. I am reminded to slow down and to see the world through his eyes as he discovers everything for the first time.

My favorite thing is when he stops nursing, looks up at me and starts smiling all while milk is rolling down his little check. He is absolutely precious!


I been given the responsibility to raise and train him up to become a man after God's heart. That is a pretty humbling challenge, but thankfully I'm not alone. I have a wonderful husband who is right there beside me.

Transitioning from working full time to being a stay at home mom has been a slow change. I love my days with Silas, but it just takes some getting used to being at home instead of being out and about. Honestly though, I wouldn't have it any other way. Every day Silas seems to grow and I don't want to miss anything.

I can't believe how quickly my little one is growing!

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Motherhood

At the beginning of the year I had an idea that I would journal and list something that I was thankful for everyday. Well that lasted until February 10th when Silas arrived in the world, and my life changed, in a good way. I didn't stop becoming thankful for all the blessings in my life, rather I just didn't have the time to write them all down. And to be honest, during those sleep deprived first few weeks of motherhood, it was all I could do to try and function everyday.

I am thankful for all the support my family provided me while I was recovering from childbirth, dealing with a jaundice baby, nursing difficulties (let's just say that nursing wasn't as easy or natural as I thought, but I'm so grateful that after a long, frustrating struggle, nursing is now one of my favorite things to do with Silas!) and just trying to figure this motherhood thing out. Motherhood is no joke and is definitely not for the weary, but every time my eyes meets Silas', my heart just melts.

Currently I am also a working mother and I have great respect for the number of women who do work full time, and still care for their family. I'm lucky enough that in about two weeks I won't have to work anymore (I am going to be taking a long term maternity leave for my current co-teacher in the fall, but after that six weeks I can pick and choose when and if I want to continue subbing in my school). I do look forward to long, lazy days of summer with Silas as we establish a routine.

Silas is growing so much and is cuter than ever! This week he started to giggle whenever we make faces for him. He also started to roll over to his back when on his tummy. I love it when he greats me with a smile when I pick him up from his crib. Everyday is so special with my little one. I knew that I would love being a mother, I just couldn't comprehend how much I would love it or how much I would love Silas!

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My Natural Birth Story

I finally have a few spare minutes to write about my birth story before I forget it. It is hard to believe that one month ago Silas was born. Brett and I were talking about it last night, how we can't even imagine life without him now! We have been very blessed by his arrival into our family. I love him so much, and I am also amazed at how my love for Brett has grown even more watching him love and care for little Silas.

Brett and I were really committed to having a natural, medication-free birth. It is something that I really wanted because I felt that my body was created to do this. After we found out we were expecting, we began looking into natural birth resources and enrolled in the Bradley Method class. Even though I wanted a natural birth, I was still really anxious about it. I don't handle pain well, and as prepared for birth as you can be you will never really know what it feels like until you are there. Regardless of that, I'm one of the people who likes to be prepared and know what is expected. I knew that if I educated myself, Brett and I would be able to make the right decisions during labor if medication and intervention was necessary.

It all started on Wednesday February 9th. Brett was home sick with a sinus infection and fortunately I was home on a snow day. Looking back I realize what a special day that was for Brett and I. We were both home together, relaxing and enjoying one another before our lives would forever change. All day I felt great, everything was normal. I had been having a few random Braxton Hicks contractions every once in a while, but I was only 38 weeks so I didn't think much of it. Between about 8:00-9:00 that evening I started feeling, what I thought, was gas pressure and pain. Now I realize I was beginning to have contractions. Up until this point at my weekly doctor's appointments I have never had my cervix checked, but I was going to have it checked on Thursday at my next appointment. We went to bed about 9:30 that evening, but I didn't sleep well because of the pressure that I was feeling. I do remember at one point thinking, "Could these be contractions? No, it's too early." I slept off and on until about 2:00. Finally I got up and started walking around to alleviate some of the discomfort. I found it was really comfortable to sit in a chair and lean back. At 2:30 I noticed that I was bleeding, so I pulled out our Bradley book to review the information and decided that it was time to wake Brett up and call the doctor's office. The doctor on call told me to go ahead and head over to the hospital to be hooked up to a fetal monitor and be checked in to make sure the baby wasn't in any stress. Brett and I debated back and forth if we should even bother bringing our bags, which I just happened to pack that day thankfully! We finally decided it would be wise to bring our things just in case. I still didn't realize that I was in labor.

Around 4:00am we finally arrived at the labor and delivery ward of the hospital. The nurse checked us in, hooked me up to the fetal monitor and checked my cervix. The nurse told me that I was dilated to a 5 and was in fact in labor! By this time those "gas pains" that I was having were beginning to get pretty regular and coming every 5 minutes. So needless to say, they were not gas pains but in fact contractions. The nurse was pretty impressed that I was having them all night and not realizing what they were or experiencing severe pain. My thoughts are is that if you have never had a contraction, how are you supposed to know what they feel like? As I was being checked in, and having my IV line inserted, I became very nauseous for a few minutes. I think it was mainly because everything was setting in and I realized that everything we had been planning for was about to happen. I had a few moments where I didn't think I could do this, but lucky for me Brett was an amazing coach and comforted me.



From about 4:00-7:00 when I wasn't hooked up to the fetal monitor, I would be walking the halls. My contractions were starting to become a little more intense, but I still can not say that they were painful. It was much more comfortable for me to labor standing up and walking around, then laying in the bed on the monitor. I even tried to sit on a birthing ball, but that really wasn't very comfortable either. When I had to be monitored and in bed, it felt much better to lay on my side while I was having a contraction. Sometime between 7:00-8:00 I was checked again, I was dilated between a 6. By this time my mom had made it to the hospital.

My doctor, Dr. Newby, came in around 9am to check me. I was pretty lucky that she was at this location on this day. My doctor is apart of a pretty large practice that has two offices, one at this hospital and another office at a different hospital. We were scheduled to have an appointment with her later in the day at this location, so the chances of her being able to deliver my baby greatly increased.
We had a wonderful nurse to support us. When she came in at 7:00 she asked about our birth plan and we told her that we really wanted a natural, med-free birth. She was totally on board with that, and at no point did she ever offer medication to me during a contraction. She helped me get into positions that she thought might be more comfortable. I continued to walk the halls, but as I was having contractions that were becoming a bit more strong, I had to lean up against the wall. I know this sounds crazy, but through all my contractions I really can't say that I was in pain, rather I was just really uncomfortable and felt a lot of pressure.

At 10:00 my doctor came back in to check me and I was still at a 6. She asked if I wanted my water broken to get things moving along a little faster, but we said we said that we wanted to wait a little while longer. Brett called our Bradley instructor at this point for a little advice and she reminded him about the Natural alignment plateau where it appears that I am not progressing. She encouraged us to remain positive and hold off on breaking the bag of waters a little while longer. At 10:15 I was hooked up to the IV to have some fluids to avoid dehydration for about 20 minutes. Being hooked up to the IV is what we think really made things progress. I remember looking at the clock around 11:00 after the IV had been removed thinking that the contraction were getting more intense. It was too uncomfortable to walk the halls anymore. I tried to stand through a few contractions leaning up against the table, but the contractions became more frequent. I was in transitional labor and this is the point where I really began to feel some pain. It was best to sit on the side of the bed and lean over a chair during the contractions.
At 11:30 my nurse was getting ready to check me again because I was feeling a lot of pressure, almost like I was ready to push. As she was preparing to check me I was laying on my side, during the next contraction the pressure was very intense. My water broke. It felt like a balloon popped inside of me, something like I have never felt before. As soon as my water broke, things moved really quickly. Within the next two contractions the urge to push was undeniable. The nurse checked me, and sure enough I was crowning. I was told to breathe through the next contractions and try not to push as we waited for the room to be transformed and the doctor to arrive. The pressure to push was unbearable. Finally the doctor was in the room and on my next contraction Silas came out. I really don't think I had to push at all, he was ready to be born!

He was placed on my chest immediately after he was born. The next hour was a blur, but Silas got to remain on my chest for the whole time. He was born at 11:43am weighing 6 pounds, 9 ounces and 18 inches long. I was able to have the natural birth that I wanted with no medication. I can honestly say it was only when I was in transitional labor was when I really felt great pain. In fact the most painful part of my labor was the afterbirth when the nurses and doctors were pressing on my stomach trying to get my uterus to contract and I had to have stitches for a minor tear.

My labor went better than I had ever planned or imagined. I know I am one of those lucky ones who had a fast and easy labor. The only thing I would change for next time would be to eat and take a shower before going to the hospital. I was so hungry all during my labor, but couldn't eat anything. For me going through the Bradley Method classes really helped me prepare for my labor, and even though this may sound crazy, I'm looking forward to my time around!

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O Holy Night...

I love being pregnant at Christmas time! This year, especially since I am pregnant, I have been thinking a lot about Mary and her pregnancy with our Savior. I think about my son all the time. I talk to him and pray over him. I think about his arrival when I get to hold him in my arms and see his face for the first time.

One of my favorite Christmas songs comes from The City on a Hill: It's Christmas Time. It's Sara Grove's song, Child of Love. Every year when I play the CD, that particular songs moves me. It has even greater meaning to me this year at Christmas. The lyrics are so beautiful, and I get goosebumps and teary-eyed every time I hear it.

Child of wonder, close your eyes

Rest here in my arms tonight

Someday you will save the world

But tonight I'll hold you right here in my arms

Precious miracle of life, child of love

Gift of hope, the gift of life from the Father above

And you were made for all mankind

You will always be mine, child of love

Gabriel's promise has come true

God has blessed this world with you

And as I humbly hold You now

In my heart I know I'm holding Heaven's child

Precious miracle of life, child of love

Gift of hope, the gift of live from the Father above

And you were made for all mankind

You will always be mine, child of love

Child of wonder, close your eyes

A Christmas craf tthat I made is actually something that I made a school with my fourth graders called light bulb ornaments. All you need is an old, light bulb that has burnt out, some paint, hot glue, and fabric scrapes.

Last year we made snow men by painting the light bulbs white, then putting textured snow over the paint, painted on a face, used some fabric scrapes to make a stocking cap over the metal part of the light and used yarn to make a scarf. We attached an ornament hook to the back of the hat with hot glue.

This year we made penguins. We pained the bulb black and white, painted buttons going down the middle, used hot glue to attached the eyes, pipe cleaner nose, and mittens cut out of fabric. We attached the hat to the metal again and then attached a pom-pom to the corner of the hat. They turned out so cute this year. I can't wait to make these ornaments with my children someday.

I hope that you have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

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3 B's: Bread Baking, Birthday and Baby Boy

This week was quite an eventful week for me. All three events starting with the letter B! The best thing about the week happened on Monday when Brett and I had our first ultrasound of the pregnancy. We had been waiting anxiously to see what our little one looked like and to make sure he was developing healthy. We also got to find out that Baby Osborn was, in fact a boy! We were so thrilled. Both Brett and I wanted a little boy more than anything. Everyone kept telling us that it was going to be a girl through. Even our Bradley instructor thought it was going to be a girl. So I was mentally preparing myself for a girl. I knew that I would be delighted to have a girl, but there is family significance to having a boy. I even had a dream the night before that it was a girl, so I was pretty sure that I was having a girl. When we got into the room, the nurse told us she wouldn't tell us, rather let us try and figure out on our own. At first it was hard to even figure out what I was looking at, but then he moved his legs. I couldn't believe what I saw! I was speechless when the nurse asked me what it was, because I was afraid to jinx myself. Then Brett boldly asked, "Is it a boy?!?" The nurse said yes, and I burst out into tears of joy I couldn't believe my eyes, it was the second best thing I heard since becoming pregnant (the first being when we got to hear the heartbeat for the first time).

Here is a picture of his little, perfect foot!

and here he makes his grand debut with his first picture.

The second fun thing about this week was bread baking day at school. Every fall the fourth grade makes Bread-in-a-Bag. A retired teacher provides all the supplies and she even makes each student a jar of jelly. She and two other retired teachers (one who I got to teach with my first two years) come up to school to teach the fourth graders how to make bread. The kids love it and the whole school smells so good for the day. At the end of the day the students take home a bag with a whole loaf of bread that they made, a jar of jelly and the directions with the recipe so they can try it at home with their family. It really is an easy process!

Here is the recipe:

Mix 4 cups of flour, 1 package of yeast, 3 tablespoons of sugar and 1 teaspoon of salt in a large gallon zip lock bag. Close the bag and shake to mix well. Open the bag to add 1 1/2 cups of hot water and 3 tablespoons of vegetable oil. Close the bag, and with your fingers, knead the dough until well incorporated. (The students loved this part, and since everything was in the bag, no mess on the desks or their hands!) You may add more flour if the dough is still sticky.

Spray bread pans with vegetable spray. Divide the dough into two equal halves. (Each bag makes two loaves of bread.) Put the dough into the bread pans and spray with vegetable spray. Let rise in a warm place. Bake at 375 degrees for 35-40 minutes. Let cool, then remove from pans. So easy! Plus you could easily add other spices like fresh rosemary or cinnamon.

At the end of the day we let the student try a little bit of the bread with the jelly and butter. We made our own butter too. All we did was put heavy cream in small little containers, seal tightly, and passed them around the classroom as the students took turns shaking the cream until it harden. We added a little salt for flavor, but it was pretty easy. Our kids loved the day! I loved the day too, except I was totally exhausted at the end of the day being on my feet all day and leaning over their desks to help knead.

Along with both these events, yesterday I celebrated my birthday with wonderful husband. He brought flowers home from work the night before, and we had dinner at my favorite Italian restaurant (we both agreed on no birthday gifts for each other this year as we are saving money and getting ready to bring our little boy into the world!) It was the end to a perfect week!

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